


Cullen and Lileas, Sitting in a Tree

by Starla-Nell (Princess_Nell)



Series: The Bournshire Boys [23]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games)
Genre: F/M, offscreen sex, wanting the same person, without making it their problem
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-29
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:40:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,422
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24970951
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Princess_Nell/pseuds/Starla-Nell
Summary: Cullen has a bit of a fling in school. With someone Alistair'd had a crush on. Whoops.
Relationships: Cullen Rutherford/OC
Series: The Bournshire Boys [23]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/472279
Kudos: 2





	1. After the First Date

**Author's Note:**

> Cullen'd always struck me as someone who'd've started dating, at least, in high school. So I hit the make-it-worse button and made his first relationship with someone Alistair liked. Whoops! 
> 
> There's a foreshadowing to your Alimancer and your Cullenmancer in this fic, because they're beautiful and fantastic, plus a few references to in-game dialogue. Enjoy!

“So, how’d it go?” Drystan asked Cullen pointedly, walking backwards in the hall to face their little group. Yes, Alistair was there, but Drystan probably assumed Cullen had told Alistair about his date. He hadn’t.

Cullen contrived to look innocent. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He tried to brush past Drystan, and ended up in a balance contest that involved a lot of elbows.

“How’d what go?” Drat, Alistair’d picked it up already.

Cullen tried to catch Drystan’s eye, but too late: “Cullen went on a date.”

“What? Traitor! Ha!” Alistair looked surprised and a little impressed.

Cullen scoffed at the idea. “Traitor? We never made any no-date pact. What, are we avowed loners now?”

“That’s right, brothers-in-arms,” Alistair said jokingly. “No girls allowed.”

“What, are you five?” Cullen rolled his eyes.

“You never answered the question.” Sieffre was persistent. Cullen had really been hoping to _avoid_ the question. But perhaps that was more than he should have hoped for. 

“It … went. It was fun,” Cullen said, allowing himself a smile. “We had a good time.”

“So did you kiss her?” Farris asked.

Cullen ignored him, striding ahead to the library, but his ears turned pink.

“Oh, come on,” Drystan said, elbowing him.

“Maybe a little.” Cullen could feel his ears heat up. “Don’t we have a test?”

Alistair laughed. “It did go well!” He was taking this well. Maybe Cullen was right the first time, and Alistair had no interest in Lileas. Cullen couldn’t help it that they’d hit it off so well during their trip into town, setting up this date before they’d even gotten back to the school.

“What was it like?” Farris asked.

“It was – weird,” Cullen admitted. “I paid attention to her, tried to be a gentleman. I stopped to ask if it was too soon, and she practically tackled me.”

“And?” Farris pushed.

“It was nice.” Cullen decided that was enough. They wouldn’t get anything more out of him.

“King of the understatement, you are now crowned!” Alistair set an imaginary crown on Cullen’s head.

Farris scoffed. “You’re – brave or stupid, I don’t know which,” he said to Cullen.

“I was terrified.” But not of the wrath of the Sisters, like Farris probably assumed.

“Brave then,” Drystan decided, “according to Ser Clancy, the brave overcome their fear. The stupid don’t have it.”

Alistair had been getting a thoughtful look on his face. _Always a bad sign._ “Who’s the girl?”

Drystan scrunched up his face, thinking. “What was her name, someone you met in the kitchens? Lily?”

“Lileas.” Alistair’s face had dropped into a mask, with anger leaking out around the edges.

“Yeah! That was—Alistair, what’s wrong?”

Alistair had stopped them, blocking Cullen’s path. “You! You asked _her?_ I trusted you, I introduced you, and you took advantage?”

“I – took advantage?”

“You and your–your _hands_ and your going _in_ for that _kiss_!”

“She kissed me!” Cullen insisted, taking the wind out of Alistair’s sails.

“What! No…”

“You know her so well?” Cullen pressed, “Why wouldn’t she be interested in me? Huh?”

“Because I thought… I thought she was interested in me, alright?”

Cullen stared at him, trying to figure out if Lileas had ever flirted with Alistair, even once.

“Oh, don’t look at me like that,” Alistair said sullenly. “She, she laughs at all of my jokes, even the ones _I_ think are bad. She smiles at me – a lot!”

“She smiles all the damn time!” Cullen cries, remembering her smiling at absolutely everyone they talked to in town. “It’s what she does! She smiles!”

“Oh, shut up. I take it back. You are a traitor.” Alistair stalked off, away from the library. 

“Well, that explains why he was upset,” Farris said, allowing a hand to settle heavily between Cullen’s shoulder blades.

Cullen tried not to wail, “How was I supposed to know!”

“Come on, Farris,” Drystan, Cullen’s _supposed_ friend, said. “We have that test to study for. Cullen needs to go figure out what to say to his roommate.”

\---

Cullen came in, closed the door behind him. No socks, anywhere. Things are picked up, for the most part. That’s honestly a surer sign that things aren’t right than anything in their argument.

“Listen, I’m”—

“No, don’t,” Alistair interrupted, cutting Cullen off. “It’s me. I should have talked to you about my hopes for her.”

Cullen shook his head, determined to carry his share of blame. “Well, but I should have mentioned it, like you said. It’s just, you weren’t there that day, and … I was thoughtless. Even if she was only a friend, you had a right to know about it.”

“Okay. I’m… sorry about calling you a traitor. Twice.” Alistair’s hesitant smile falls off his face. “I’m older than you. I didn’t think you’d kiss a girl before me.”

“Like age has anything to do with it. At the farm, some of the kids were playing I’ll-show-you-mine when they were 10.”

“Were you one of those kids?” Alistair looked surprised, but not disapproving.

“Nah, I wanted to become a templar, and I still had all my farm duties.”

“Heh, you said doody,” Alistair blurted.

“Oh, grow up,” Cullen snaps.

“You first,” Alistair said, shrugging.

An awkward silence settled in the room.

Cullen broke it. “If you want, I can stop seeing her…”

“I’ve… thought about whether I would ask for that,” Alistair said. “What do you feel? When you’re with her?”

“What?” Cullen asked, feeling like Leolin had just rammed into him full-force.

Alistair rolled his eyes. “Do you feel anything?”

“My heart flops over when she looks at me,” Cullen admitted. “I get butterflies knowing I’m going to see her. When things started going well, it felt like – like a thousand lightening bugs were beating against the inside of my chest, trying to get out. I had to be so careful not to rush, not to mess it up.”

“Oh,” Alistair said, crestfallen.

“I’m sorry,” Cullen said. “You too?”

To Cullen’s surprise, Alistair wailed plaintively, “No! None of that. It-it seems like I should want the things everyone talks about. I _do_ want them, in fact. With girls. They’re all so – beautiful to watch, and imagine in the baths, but…”

“But no-one has really caught your eye yet.”

“Yeah,” Alistair sighed.

“So why were you so mad, then?”

Alistair snorted a laugh. “Remember when I got that horse for Lileas?”

“Oh,” Cullen said. “Yes?”

“I thought that was a date. I thought we were going to ride into town together.” Alistair sighed. “I had all these ideas in my head about what was going to happen, and it ends up… she didn’t have any of them. I guess the fact that she had ideas with you just shows that… it was me, not her. But if I’m not feeling any of those things, then it’s definitely for the best.”

“Don’t worry so much. You’ll feel those things for somebody. They’ll catch your eye, and you’ll be glad you didn’t push yourself. That person will be so special. I can’t wait to meet them!”

“And just try to take _her_ away from me.” Alistair held up an imaginary sword in Avaar-gladiator style. “I’d fight you!” He hopped around the tiny room a bit, slicing the imaginary sword through furniture and walls. “And win!”

Cullen grinned at his goofball roommate. “I have a better idea.”

“Huh?” Alistair paused in his antics.

“Just tell me, and I won’t go after her.”

“It’s a deal.” Alistair grinned. “You. Always so… serious, you.”

“That’s what I’m here for,” Cullen deadpanned.

Alistair huffs. “What am I here for, then?” 


	2. And also Ducking into a Barn

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen like Lileas--feels dizzy kissing her--but he also knows where his priorities lie.

“So, second date, huh?” Alistair blurted. “Date number two?” Maker, is nervousness contagious?

“Yes, Alistair, second date does, in fact, mean date number two.” Cullen threw a dirty sock, but Alistair batted it aside. _No, wait, is Cullen even nervous?_

“Are you sure you’re okay with this?” He ran his fingers through his hair, which somehow made the curls look better. Alistair wished suddenly and intensely that he had curly hair.

“Me? Yes, definitely.” Alistair dismissed the possibility without thinking about it. “Any potential I had is gone. I wish the best for you both.”

Cullen checked his reflection and got something from his drawer, but Alistair didn’t see what.

“I just – I’m impressed,” Alistair said, actually thinking about it now. “And jealous that you found someone so soon. Do you think you’ll get married? Have little Cullens and Cullettes?”

“I don’t know yet, Alistair,” Cullen said evenly. “It’s too soon to say.”

“Ah, why can’t you ever rise to my bait?” Alistair flopped down on his bed, defeated by the seriousness that is Cullen.

“I have to go,” he said, but he was smiling.

“Just once?” Not that he really wanted a fight or anything, just some sort of reaction, any reaction.

“Good _night_ , Alistair,” Cullen said, laughing. Alistair would take it.

Alistair looked out the window, feeling weirdly lonely. Cullen and Lileas were walking around the lake, just visible from the dorms.

“Not even a proper lake,” he muttered to himself. But he continued watching as Cullen took off his coat and gave it to Lileas. His fingers brushed her neck as he helps her into it, and Alistair felt far too much, glad for them and swampingly lonely himself. “Damn it!” Alistair closed the blinds and headed down to the practice field.

\---

Cullen slid his plain brown coat onto Lileas’ arms, wishing he had something warmer to offer. Feathers, maybe, or fur. Then she sucked in a small gasp and shivered into it and turned on the spot, standing so close. Watching her carefully, smiling, he put his hands on her waist and steps a little closer. _What does her mouth taste like today?_ The first time he kissed her, it was cinnamon and clove. _Could it really taste like that all the time?_

“I – I forgot what we were talking about,” Cullen said, kicking himself for his rudeness with a small wince.

She smiled at him, though, and he couldn’t tear his eyes from her lips. “I believe you were just saying how much you wanted to kiss me.”

“How very forward of me,” Cullen said with a surprised chuckle. “I—would that be okay?”

“Yes, please.” _Oh, Maker, her smile._

Cullen leaned in, slowly, and kissed Lileas. He moaned just a bit at the taste of cinnamon and cloves. She moaned as he kissed her thoroughly, moving one hand from her back to cradle her head, careful of her curls.

 _Maker, kissing her is giving me ideas._ When they finally broke apart, Cullen was having trouble breathing, but Lileas was panting, too. Cullen backed away a small step, fearing he might kiss her until they were discovered.

Once she’d caught her breath, she raised an eyebrow at Cullen. “Do you know where it would be warmer?”

“Yes,” he said, then realized. “Wait, no, where?” _Smooth, Rutherford._ “Where did you mean?” _Great recovery._ He smiled helplessly at her, but she seemed to enjoy his awkwardness, somehow.

“The stables! Let’s go!” She took his hand and led the way as his brain rejoiced. This was a good sign for some of those ideas he was having. The stables were warm, with no one around this time of day. _And there must be a reason it’s called a roll in the hay._

It occurred to him that once they got there and he kissed her again, he might not have been able to stop. And yet, he knew, from drama among the older kids at home, that sometimes people believe that ‘not stopping’ was a commitment. A commitment he believed he could not make, not above his duty. He gently tugged her elbow as she reached for the stable door.

“Wait, Lileas, before we go in, I should ask you.” His body objected to putting this—this potential at risk, but he would not let her down if he could help it. “What are you looking for?”

“What do you mean?” she asked, grinning teasingly. She licked her lips, and Cullen nearly forgot his words.

“I – Are you looking for a good time, or something… longer-term?” Cullen blushes at his own stumbling words.

“Don’t worry, I won’t get in the way of your training,” Lileas said, cocking her hip distractingly. “I like you, and I think we will have a wonderful time in that stable, but I’m not looking for more than that. Will that be alright?” _Maker, she’s beautiful._

“Cullen?”

In response, he stepped forward and kissed her, scrabbling for the door to let them in. She broke the kiss and swayed a bit on the spot. Cullen took her elbow, trying to put his question onto his face so he didn’t have to ask with words.

She said, “I have precautions.”

“Oh, yes, of course. So do”—Cullen was cut off when Lileas grabbed his hand and dragged him into the stable.


	3. Kiss & Tell

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Conversation between friends the morning after.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I think Cullen would kiss & tell, insofar as it will help his friends (and his friends' partners). And also embarrass Alistair.

It was a beautiful morning. There were birds singing loudly enough to be heard over the recruits as they collected their breakfasts. The sun streamed in through the windows, gilding stone floors and walls in the Maker’s golden light.

“Good morning,” Cullen said.

“Maker!” Alistair exclaimed, jumping more than was warranted. “Turn off the sunshine. I’m not sure I can take it this early.”

“What are you talking about?” Cullen sat down with his plate of biscuits and gravy.

“He’s right, Cullen.” Sieffre was actually backing Alistair up for once! “What is wrong with you?”

“I’m in a good mood. Isn’t that allowed?” Cullen was grinning ear-to-ear.

Alistair glanced around the table to collect the will of Cullen’s inner circle. “This early?”

And right on cue, they all chorused, “No,” with varying degrees of enthusiasm.

“Alright,” Cullen said, pausing before laying his metaphorical card on the table with a smug smile. “I guess I won’t tell you about my date.”

“Wait, you had a date?” That pulled the favor of the entire table to Cullen’s side. Alistair shrugged philosophically and dug into his pile of turnips with turnip greens.

“I saw her on the way out from dinner and invited her to walk around the lake yesterday evening,” Cullen said agreeably.

Drystan was unexpectedly excited by this information. “That was you!”

“What? Sit down. You saw me – us?”

“Sorry.” Drystan resumed his seat. “You were the ones – I saw a couple going down toward the stables.”

“You took her for a ride? At night?” Alistair didn’t expect this perfectly reasonable question to get incredulous looks from all of his friends, plus a few by-sitters who had previously not appeared to have been listening.

“Well,” shrugged Farris, “in a manner of speaking.” Everyone cracked up.

Alistair felt slow. Again. _Why was this funny…_

“As a point of fact,” Cullen said, digging into his biscuits and gravy, “other… pursuits were just as fun.” Cullen grinned, then raised a hand to wiggle his first two fingers in an oddly specific curl. _Oh._ Alistair could actually _feel_ the burning of his own ears.

“I think he’s caught up,” drawled Drystan.


	4. No Love, No Marriage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cullen discovers that emotions can be surprising and bewildering.

About a week later, Alistair was a little surprised when everyone joins his table. He knew they put up with him, like a painting that’s just always been there and you get used to it and it’s ugly and you wouldn’t choose to have it around but since it is you don’t really notice. So no one commented to him that he got to their table first.

The other boys were still grilling Cullen about his ongoing love life, though, and that was actually starting to get old for Alistair. He didn’t know why, it just bothered him, and it felt all out of proportion to their conversation.

“So, you’re not playing the field? You’re sticking with the one partner?” asked Drystan, in an honestly curious tone.

“It’s great. It’s nice,” Cullen said. “I’d recommend it. I think we… got better this time.” Cullen had the good grace to blush, at least.

“But what do you _do_?” Farris insisted. “What makes it better?”

“I’m not giving you a blow-by-blow, like a tourney announcer,” Cullen said, laughing.

All three of Cullen’s friends snorted indelicate laughter. _What? Oh, blow. Good one._ Alistair was debating leaving—he was close enough to done with his breakfast, but the next question nailed him to his seat.

“Right, fine, don’t give us details, but your very good friends—and any lady-friends we might have in the future!—could benefit from any _tips_ … you might have,” Farris insisted.

Cullen looked very thoughtful. Alistair was about to give up and take his tray away, when he seemed to come to a decision, nodding his head.

“Look,” Cullen explained, “I’m new to this myself. I heard from one of the older farm boys back home that putting your tongue in her ear helps, but it doesn’t.”

“Ew!” was the general consensus, followed by “Duh.” Alistair had nothing to add, but it seemed like there was something important he should ask.

“But, I mean, we were able to… get past that … really awkward moment. Why did I even tell you about it?”

“For our edification?” Alistair blurted, but there was still something nagging at him.

“I guess what I mean is, everyone likes different things. You’ll just have to experiment.”

Alistair had finally found the question bothering him. “This experiment.” He ate a bite of biscuit to give himself time to be sure of the wording. “Do you intend for it to continue?”

“I don’t know. That will partly be up to her, won’t it?”

“You didn’t establish that ahead of time?” Alistair regretted pushing the question, if not asking it in the first place, as he watched Cullen’s face change.

“What we established,” he suddenly launched angrily, “ _if_ it’s _any_ of your business, which it’s not, is that she wants to have some fun, and we don’t want our relationship to interfere with my templar training. Which it will, if we don’t finish breakfast and get to class.” Cullen left, pocketing a piece of fruit and stuffing a final bite of biscuit in his mouth.

“So much for that good mood,” Sieffre said. “That was sudden.”

“It’s our captain,” Farris pointed out, “how long did you expect it to last?”

But Alistair could barely hear them through the buzzing in his mind as he worked out what it meant. “Shit!” he exclaimed, possibly for the first time since the sisters cured him of swearing. He followed Cullen.

\---

He caught up with him just outside of class and managed to apologize, but Cullen put off any discussion until their next break. When he got the chance, Alistair apologized again. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know you wanted more with her.”

“How could you? I didn’t know either, until last night. You know the worst of it? I was relieved. My hope of meeting a special someone before I get assigned to some circle – probably isolated from everyone and everything – and I was relieved to have it off the table.”

“Well, that’s what she wants too, right?” Alistair said, smiling. “Some fun before you go? It actually works out.”

“I think so. But you know that warning Sister Moyra gave about falling in love for physical reasons? I didn’t think it was possible, and now I’m finding myself – obsessing about her, almost. I feel like I’m losing control. Like I’m under the sway of a blood mage.”

“Cullen, Lileas is an amazing woman,” and Alistair was surprised to find that didn’t hurt to admit, “but she is _not_ a blood mage.”

“Really? Are you sure?” Cullen demanded. “The sisters say anyone could be a blood mage. It comes up in nearly every lesson. I could be corrupted.”

“Cullen, a blood mage would need your _blood_ to corrupt you. I mean, I’ve heard of people having that kink but…?”

“No, of course not,” Cullen responded dismissively.

“Well, then, nothing to worry about,” Alistair said, clapping him on the back. He winced.

“She doesn’t love me.” Cullen looked despondent, but not inconsolable. So? What? He didn’t love Lileas, yet he wanted her to love him?

Alistair blinked. “Watch out, or your pride will supplant your duty after all.”

“You think so?” Cullen sounded a little worried at the idea.

Alistair wrapped an arm over Cullen’s shoulders. He _always_ hated that. “You don’t want to stay with her, you say you don’t love her, but you’re obsessed because you want her to love you. If you had any more pride, you’d be a _lion_. Come on, let’s get to class.”


End file.
